Sunday, 2 November 2008

The third question

Lately, all my conversations with people seem to reach a now-predictable stalemate. This is especially the case, when the people concerned are old friends, family or otherwise-very-concerned-for-me people whom I have not met for a while.

The conversations generally begin quite are you, what are you upto these days and all that. But as soon as they feel that they are well versed with my current state of affairs, when they feel just comfy enough, out comes THE question. Statistically speaking, it is generally the third question. Sometimes the question is disguised as a comment [ almost a passing comment, at times], sometimes as a suggestion. But the question is always lurking there, waiting to catch me unaware. At more distressing times, it is even accompanied by helpful suggestions for me, just so that I can triumph over the "problem".

In case, you are wondering, what the question is, here it is, with some of its variants and some of the suggestions...

When are you getting married?
Why are you not getting married?
Why are you single?
Why are you not going out with someone?
Don't you like someone?
So, did you find someone yet?

I think you should go out more often and meet some girls.
This is the age to get married.
Think about your parents.
It'll be too late to marry if you do not be quick about it.
Think about your would-be children.
All of your friends, even your juniors, are married off.
Ask your parents to find a nice girl for you.
You have a steady job. You should get married now.

More insightful suggestions:
You should cut off your hair or else no girl will marry you.
Forget the past, find a nice girl and settle down.
You smoke too much. Stop smoking or you won't find a nice girl.
You should not have got the tattoo.
Stop listening to heavy metal.
You are too weird. Mend your ways.
Shave that goatee and sideburns.
Take off those ear rings.



  1. *Pom pom, here comes more:

    i)Dont get married, Abhishek, just because somebody else got married.
    ii) Dont marry someone your parents are pretty capble of that, are you not? On the other hand, when people suggest something on similar lines, ask them to pass their nominations on to you.
    iii) Enjoy being single, there's nothing like it.
    iv) Dont chop off your hair, shave your goatee or sideburns, remove your earrings just to get married.
    v) Can you really change your taste of music? So what if you like heavy metal?
    vi) Dont smoke too much... its bad for health. Giving it up is your choice, ultimately...not a remedy of being single.
    vii) Hey, marriage is not the ultimate goal in life.. so, even if you have a steady job, u can be just the way u are. Chill.
    viii) Would be children? Bad joke, really. Do we need little Abhisheks, all the more funkier?
    ix) Can you realy forget the past? Its easier said than done. For everybody, mark my words.
    x) List out your ideas about marriage on a paper... you would find out whetehr you are ready for it or not.

  2. the cost of stating the obvious...i do not even dream of agreeing to any of the suggestions posted on the is what has been/ is being said to me...

  3. LOL! There are three kinds of people:
    1. Those who have crossed the river seen how crappy the 'greener side' really is but having got screwed over will not deign to suffer it alone and therefore make more encouraging signs of crossing over to their unsuspecting brethren on the other bank.

    2. Those who are currently in the boat which is always so designed so as to have the exact number of holes, so you realise you are sinking only when you have crossed half way and there is not to be done but paddle your way to barely make it to the other side and become part of category 1.

    3. The starry eyed naive standing on this side of the river looking with longing eyes at what lies across. Inspite of the nagging gut feeling that begs them to stay back, they see their 'well wishers' giving them the thumbs up from across yonder green lands. Oh woe of woes!...there they go to join category 2....and life goes on. :D

  4. I TOTALLY identify with this post. Could not have articulated better. Only the suggestions are different in my case. The rest is exactly the same.

  5. Do we need little Abhisheks, all the more funkier?
    Like Anupama said- Do we? Really? I mean, like, little pricks running around spewing aphorisms even as they mess their little baby diapers?

  6. totally agreeing with anupama on all the points especially about "little abhisheks"....we certainly dont want any more!!....

    everyone has their reasons to get married or stay single..and as long as one is happy with either of the two status its should be fine for other(well wishers) also...but then..happiness is an illusion....

  7. N herez the most insightful suggestion of the highest order- pl, pls pls don't crop ur hair I've always envied ur silky-smooth-staright hair!!! :D